Rugby

[Ian Marshall]

Got a freebie day out at Twickenham tomorrow. Have just realised a few of the people who are 'entertaining' me are actually quite in to their rugby. You know the sort - London insurance types.

I need a crash course in the sport, how things currently lie and not looking like a complete penis (I realise this part is difficult when you consider the way I dress and my personality).

 

[Nottingham Fox]

When the egg is bouncing on one part of the pitch, the players are in a scrum somewhere completely different on the pitch :icon_lol:

 

[Cate Fox]

They cant pass the ball forwards when running for a try, it has to go backwards...

 

[H T B]

If you're in the top tier at Twickers, you can't see feck all anyway, so just drink.

 

[RHYDAL]

You have to down all your pints in one, show your arse at every opportunity, learn 'Eskimo Nell' and take a radio for the footy results.

 

[homer]

Ollie Ollie Ollie Oxen, two by four, two by four.....

 

[Darth Vodka]

it's not the done thing to behave like a football fan. don't expect singing all game or the crowd effing and blinding at the players

as Cate says, the ball has to be passed backwards. you can kick it forward to someone, as long as they are behind you when you kick it (otherwise they are offside)

a try is five points and you get a kick at goal for a conversion of 2 points. penalties are 3 points, you can attempt to kick a penalty over the posts from anywhere on the pitch. drop goals are also 3 points (you drop the ball, it bounces and you kick it over) and you can do them from anywhere, but they are difficult

the referee points to the side that has won the ball (the opposite to football). an arm diagonally up is a penalty, a horizontal arm is a scrum and a crooked arm (like a lollipop lady) is a free kick

England and France are undefeated in the six nations so far, so this one will probably decide the grand slam

it's a world cup year and winning the 6 nations is seen as a pre-requisite to doing anything at the WC

howzat?

 

[homer]

One big titty bouncing up and down
Two big titties bouncing up and down
Three big titties bouncing up and down
We're going to have to buy a bigger bra, OI !

 

[Hazzman]

Also, the French manager is a total nob.

Call Toby Flood, Floody.

Jonny Wilkinson, Wilko.

Comment how Ben Youngs is the finest prospect in world Rugby and that Ashton is an idiot doing that Rugger League celebration trick cos one time it's going to cost us and Johnno will get very angry.

 

[fitz]

A player touching another players arse is not committing an offence.

 

[RHYDAL]

A cock or two on the pitch is to be expected.

 

[lazzer]

A player touching another players arse is not committing an offence.

although taking photos of it ..............................

 

[Boy Genius]

You also have to shout abuse at the ref at all times......


and tromboning the bloke to your left when any points are scored

 

[Mawsley]

I need a crash course in the sport, how things currently lie and not looking like a complete penis

If you are not going to go and be a total penis then you're never going to fit in.

 

[fosseboy83]

If you are not going to go and be a total penis then you're never going to fit in.

:icon_lol:

 

[lazzer]

One big titty bouncing up and down
Two big titties bouncing up and down
Three big titties bouncing up and down
We're going to have to buy a bigger bra, OI ![/quote]

[YOUTUBE]4dWOUaoksZI[/YOUTUBE]

 

[fitz]

If you are not going to go and be a total penis then you're never going to fit in.

 

[Darth Vodka]

and contrary to popular belief...rugby players don't just sing songs and drink loads

erm....

actually we do, but it's good fun

 

[Macky]

although taking photos of it ..............................

:icon_lol:

 

[MKFox]

We call up homer to sing us a song,
So sing, sing, or show us your ring,
We’ve seen your ring, it’s a terrible thing,
So sing you bastard sing