Wales manager Gary Speed confirmed dead

[gregs_y2k]

That's a fair point, gregs, though if it does turn out to be depression, which seems likely, the idea that suicide from depression is selfish is ridiculous. It's a horrible illness taking someone's life, not someone being selfish at all.

Completely agree. Depression is completely misunderstood by most of society. I'm just wary of jumping to conclusions into the circumstances we really have no knowledge on. This has completely come out of left field. I mean he was a well respected, private man with no apparent money, gambling or drinking problems going on in his life and a young managerial career that was on the up, which makes it all the more shocking that this has happened and that's why it's difficult to just assume it's due to depression. I think it probably will turn out to be the case but it really could be anything at this stage.

 

[MKFox]

While I can sympathise, do you not think he's a bit selfish to top himself and leave a wife and children and a whole host of unanswered questions? I'll save my sympathy for those who deserve it thanks.

the 2 people I've known who have done this still (15 years on) have family members and friends blaming themselves and beating themselves up for not recognising/ being able to help, so ultimately, yes.
but with any mental illness, are the consequences thought through?
You don't deserve to be vilified for your post realist, i can see his kids wondering if it's something they did that caused it in the future.
:-(

 

[Matt_B]

the 2 people I've known who have done this still (15 years on) have family members and friends blaming themselves and beating themselves up for not recognising/ being able to help, so ultimately, yes.
but with any mental illness, are the consequences thought through?
You don't deserve to be vilified for your post realist, i can see his kids wondering if it's something they did that caused it in the future.
:-(

And his wife, colleagues etc. I understand why people say it is selfish even though I don't necessarily agree with the sentiment.

 

[fitz]

While I can sympathise, do you not think he's a bit selfish to top himself and leave a wife and children and a whole host of unanswered questions? I'll save my sympathy for those who deserve it thanks.

So these people you think he has ignored out of selfishness in his tragic act don't deserve protection from people taking the piss? Some cracking logic there you absolute ****tard.

 

[fitz]

To answer beighton's question that has since disappeared, I have no idea why it would be any different.

 

[fitz]

And his wife, colleagues etc. I understand why people say it is selfish even though I don't necessarily agree with the sentiment.

I agree that it seems selfish to do such a thing but as I can't understand how or why anyone would do it I'd certainly not judge or make fun of his actions.

 

[The Major]

According to another forum there was a rumour that one of the tabloids were going to out him as gay.

 

[Realist]

the 2 people I've known who have done this still (15 years on) have family members and friends blaming themselves and beating themselves up for not recognising/ being able to help, so ultimately, yes.
but with any mental illness, are the consequences thought through?
You don't deserve to be vilified for your post realist, i can see his kids wondering if it's something they did that caused it in the future.
:-(

At least somebody can look beyond their own righteous ego an hero worship of a footballer and look at the bigger picture. While I have some sympathy for Speed, I have more sympathy for his wife and children, and no amount of righteous outrage is going to change that.

 

[Cate Fox]

According to another forum there was a rumour that one of the tabloids were going to out him as gay.

I remember that being a rumour years ago (when he was modelling for Top Man).

 

[gregs_y2k]

And his wife, colleagues etc. I understand why people say it is selfish even though I don't necessarily agree with the sentiment.

There are cases when there is selfishness involved. There was the businessman who shot his wife and daughter and then himself a few years ago because he couldn't face them finding out that his business had failed and couldn't handle the shame that the bailiffs were coming the following day to repossess their possessions.

However, it's not as black and white as that, as I'm sure depression played heavily in those events as well but selfishness also played a huge factor in his decisions that evening too.

I'm not for one second suggesting the Speed case is remotely similar to this but just highlighting that it's a very murk and complex subject that is often misunderstood by people.

 

[fitz]

I have more sympathy for his wife and children, and no amount of righteous outrage is going to change that.

So taking the piss was showing sympathy where it was deserved?I have more sympathy for those left behind, as in any death scenario it is the ones left behind that have to cope.

 

[Realist]

So taking the piss was showing sympathy where it was deserved?I have more sympathy for those left behind, as in any death scenario it is the ones left behind that have to cope.

I doubt Mrs Speed & his children will be frequenting this site soon so keep your knickers on.

 

[Blue Maniac]

At least somebody can look beyond their own righteous ego an hero worship of a footballer and look at the bigger picture. While I have some sympathy for Speed, I have more sympathy for his wife and children, and no amount of righteous outrage is going to change that.

It's nothing to do with ego or hero worship (how you've put these two together I'll never know). You clearly have no idea what causes people to end their own lives and you made a stupid, ill-informed, and hideously offensive comment about something you plainly don't understand. I seriously hope you never feel such hopelessness, despair, emptiness or confusion that you feel your only option is to end your own life. If you do, I hope your memory of these comments clears your head and forces you to rethink.

 

[PFKAKTF FOX]

I doubt Mrs Speed & his children will be frequenting this site soon so keep your knickers on.

Are you for fcuking real

 

[fitz]

I doubt Mrs Speed & his children will be frequenting this site soon so keep your knickers on.

So you have sympathy for them but find it ok to take the piss as they'll not find out? How nice!

 

[PFKAKTF FOX]

According to another forum there was a rumour that one of the tabloids were going to out him as gay.

If true no doubt the press will defend that it was in the public interest.....look at the consequences.

 

[The Major]

So you have sympathy for them but find it ok to take the piss as they'll not find out? How nice!

Tbf there are plenty of near the knuckle comments in the deathlist thread. It may be bad taste but a lot of us have been guilty of this with others.

 

[Lincs Fox]

As long as there are ignorant people like Realist kicking around, mental illness will continue to be stigmatised to the extent that men like Gary Speed will remain ashamed of admitting they have a problem.

Speed has shown us in shocking detail how indiscriminate depression can be. After all; if a successful millionaire with a beautiful wife, a young family and his dream job can be torn apart by inner demons, what chance do the rest of us stand?

This is horrific news and I am in no way ashamed to say I watched the minutes applause at Swansea choking back a lump in my throat. As a man, Speed never came across as anything other than a total professional and gentleman. He was doing a sterling job with Wales too.

 

[Realist]

Typical response from the usual rent-a-mob types, because I don't bow down at the alter of famous footballers then I'm ill informed.

If the rumours are true as to why he offed himself I expect a raft of apologies, but I won't hold my breath.

 

[Durham Fox]

There seems to be a lot of people assuming his suicide was linked to depression. As I understand it he'd been living a double life and was about to be exposed by the gutter press.

If anything good can come out of such circumstances it must surely be to finally rid this country of the scum press and their disgusting practices. Not something I necessarily think possible btw.