Valentines day....

[Boy Genius]

or lovebite on my old boy? Nah, just a birthmark sweetness.....

:icon_bigg

 

[Darth Vodka]

i got current Mrs DV a bag and a belt

****ing hoover works brilliant now

 

[Scarby]

fake rose for a quid from ASDA!! treated her

 

[Melton Fox]

I wonder how many thousands of original geniuses are going to be proposing on Valentines Day?

Thick ****s.

 

[Beliall]

oh but its so romantic

 

[Han]

I wonder how many thousands of original geniuses are going to be proposing on Valentines Day?

Thick ****s.

The fact that it's a leap year is quite worrying too...

 

[highland fox]

I shall very likely be needing 2 deliveries from the Royal Mail tomorrow....

 

[muzzysgal]

The fact that it's a leap year is quite worrying too...

Women traditionally propose on the 29th though, don't they, not the 14th?

 

[Han]

Women traditionally propose on the 29th though, don't they, not the 14th?

thought it was anytime during the year, but what do i know?

 

[Melton Fox]

I shall very likely be needing 2 deliveries from the Royal Mail tomorrow....

Betty McTavish: That English cnut from the tourist centre will have two sack loads delivered next week.

Doreen McDougal: How do you know that, Betty?

Betty McTavish: Because the thick cnut came in here last week and ordered 215 second class stamps again.

Doreen McDougal: Not again Betty, not again. Did he ask for a discount again?

Betty McTavish: Aye D'reen, you could set ya watch by the tight arsed twat.

 

[muzzysgal]

thought it was anytime during the year, but what do i know?

You only need worry for 24 hours, Nathan

 

[highland fox]

Betty McTavish: That English good looking bastard from the tourist centre will have two sack loads delivered next week.

Doreen McDougal: How do you know that, Betty?

Betty McTavish: Because the handsome brute is adored by all the chicks up here in the Highlands

Doreen McDougal: Oh I know Betty my daughter fancies him something rotten

Betty McTavish: Aye D'reen,she will have to join the queue though,I hear he's beating them off with a stick

You hear right Betty..you hear right

 

[highland fox]

You only need worry for 24 hours, Nathan

12th of Never in his case

 

[drummindefender]

can **** off. especially after the day i've had today :icon_cry:

 

[Hazzman]

can **** off. especially after the day i've had today :icon_cry:

Take it out on the football pitch.....again

 

[Biff]

When i asked Mrs Biff what she would like, 'surprise me' was her reply.

One up the jacksy should suffice.

 

[drummindefender]

Take it out on the football pitch.....again

it usually improves my performance when my love life is ****ed up :icon_lol:

 

[OldGit]

Little Melissa comes home from first grade and tells her father that they learned about the history of Valentine's Day.

"Since Valentine's Day is for a Christian saint and we're Jewish," she asks, "Will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine?"

Melissa's father thinks a bit then says, "No, I don't think God would get mad. Who do you want to give a valentine to?"

"Osama Bin Laden," she says.

"Why Osama Bin Laden," her father asks in shock.

"Well," she says, "I thought that if a little American Jewish girl could have enough love to give Osama a valentine, he might start to think that maybe we're not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit. And if other kids saw what I did and sent valentines to Osama, he'd love everyone a lot. And then, he'd start going all over the place to tell everyone how much he loved them and how he didn't hate anyone anymore."

Her father's heart swells and he looks at his daughter with newfound pride. "Melissa, that's the most wonderful thing I've ever heard."

"I know," Melissa says, "And once that gets him out in the open, the Marines could blow the living bloody shit out of him!"

 

[Tamworth Fox]

Wounder how many people will be having sex this time tomorrow

 

[muzzysgal]

When i asked Mrs Biff what she would like, 'surprise me' was her reply.

One up the jacksy should suffice.

You asked your wife what she would like for Valentine's Day? :icon_eek:

And they say romance is dead.....