"If my boys were tractors, then they would have been well suited in Suffolk tonight, but they're not, they're footballers, so we didn't expect to win"
"They are such a confused bunch, they just need me to put my arm round them and say "Don't worry, Uncle Ollie will make everything alright", and I will, it's what I do. I care about them, they care about me."
"I remember Rob Kelly saying these were a smashing bunch of lads, and he was right, they are. The fans are cnuts however, and the referee couldn't tell a tractor from an Alf Ramsey or a Paul Mariner, so why he was in Ipswich I don't know?, do you?."
"If I was Andy Gray, I'd say Apswach, but i'm not so I'll say Ipswich, but just for the cameras I will just this one time. Apswach were the better team tonight, but sometimes better teams lose, it's not always good being the better team, tonight it was OK because they won, but not always and I'll be looking to capitalise on that"
"We'll be alright in January when I get rid of them all"