My wedding speech

[stevewalshwasgod]

Shouldn’t this be in the sarcasm thread.


But seriously yv thanks a lot.

:icon_lol:

 

[Biff]

are you going to do a wedding night bedroom video nasty.its all the rage i hear :icon_bigg
seriosly, good luck

 

[fcukcov]

are you going to do a wedding night bedroom video nasty.its all the rage i hear :icon_bigg
seriosly, good luck

If I am sober enough o do anything Saturday night it certainly wont be involving a video camera!

 

[Siouxsie]

If I am sober enough o do anything Saturday night it certainly wont be involving a video camera!

A few years ago at a hen night a discussion amongst the already marrieds came to the conclusion that the wedding night is almost always less than memorable due to alcohol / exhaustion. See if you can buck the trend :icon_lol:

 

[fcukcov]

A few years ago at a hen night a discussion amongst the already marrieds came to the conclusion that the wedding night is almost always less than memorable due to alcohol / exhaustion. See if you can buck the trend :icon_lol:

Yeh a couple of friends of the other halfs got married a few years back and I managed to get the groom so pissed by the end of the night that a couplke of us had to carry him to the room and drop him on his bed fully clothed. He didn’t wake until breakfast next morning.

 

[MKFox]

it took us a couple of days to get around to having a post marriage shag....




Together at least....

 

[Siouxsie]

Yeh a couple of friends of the other halfs got married a few years back and I managed to get the groom so pissed by the end of the night that a couplke of us had to carry him to the room and drop him on his bed fully clothed. He didn’t wake until breakfast next morning.

I've been to a few weddings where the bride wasn't speaking to the groom by the end due to over indulgence!

Is your wedding local or aren't you saying in case the TB confetti throwers turn up to "support"?

 

[Leesoh]

Is your wedding local or aren't you saying in case the TB confetti throwers turn up to "support"?

I've got the rice ready just in case; egg fried, I believe.

 

[fcukcov]

I've been to a few weddings where the bride wasn't speaking to the groom by the end due to over indulgence!

Is your wedding local or aren't you saying in case the TB confetti throwers turn up to "support"?

its in my home village!

 

[fcukcov]

I've got the rice ready just in case; egg fried, I believe.

ill be full before the buffett!

 

[Siouxsie]

I've got the rice ready just in case; egg fried, I believe.

are you going to take it out of the foil containers before you throw it?

 

[lazzer]

just stand up clear your throat an announce " ladies and gentleman it gives me great pleasure'" then put your hands down your trousers of your morning suit and proceed to masturbate, :icon_lol:

 

[alex]

Well in just over a weeks time i have to make my wedding speech and I have no feckin clue what to say. So any help would be much appreciated.


Cheers fcukcov.

I loved a quote from Homer Simpson which was 'a wife is like having a best friend, and she let's you play with her breasts...'

 

[Feriol]

Been nice knowing you mate.....

 

[MHS]

just stand up clear your throat an announce " ladies and gentleman it gives me great pleasure'" then put your hands down your trousers of your morning suit and proceed to masturbate, :icon_lol:

:icon_lol:

 

[MKFox]

Good luck fatboy!

 

[Lako42]

I hate seeing people make mistakes, funny undertone though

 

[Siouxsie]

Best wishes for tomorrow then. I hope the speech and the rest of the day go well. The weather forecast isn't too bad. Enjoy the honeymoon.

 

[homer]

Best wishes for tomorrow then. I hope the speech and the rest of the day go well. The weather forecast isn't too bad. Enjoy the honeymoon even if your poor wife won't.

Bit harsh

 

[Leesoh]

are you going to take it out of the foil containers before you throw it?

I hadn't even thought about that!

Good luck fcetc. Remember to enjoy the day, and most of all, don't forget your wife when you are refilling glasses of champers.