shit chat up lines

[Incognito]

Anyhow, getting this thread vaguely back on track... I've got a few girlie versions. If any of these aren't shit and, erm, 'float your boat' let me know, eh? I could do with some new material!

I may not be Wilma Flintstone, but I know I can make your BedRock.

That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you I'd be coming too.

If you were a hamburger at McDonald's, you'd be McGorgeous.

If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.

Or, if all else fails...

Do these look real?

:icon_redf

 

[MKFox]

women don't need chat up lines, all they need to do is bend over, or get their norks out.

 

[spionfox]

That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you I'd be coming too.

If that was said to me I'd be halfway there already myself :icon_wink

 

[Steven]

If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.

That sounds familiar. :icon_conf

 

[Incognito]

That sounds familiar. :icon_conf

Feck, have we met? :icon_eek:

 

[foxin_oz]

I think that song "If I Said You Had A Beautiful Body Would You Hold It Against Me?" encapsulates the world's crappiest chat up line. :icon_conf

 

[Matt_B]

Let's be honest, neither of us are going to get much better, why not settle for once

 

[OldGit]

Poetry always goes well:

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
But I only want you because I am pissed.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes --
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.

 

[spionfox]

I love you.

 

[fcukcov]

Is that the soap down there? Could you just pick it up for me? (one for Milan to use in the not to distant future).

 

[Macky]

Would you like to come back to mine?
You can slip out of your burka & meet my teddy bear Mohammed.
Then in the morning I can make us some rashers.

 

[Darth Vodka]

Would you like to come back to mine?
You can slip out of your burka & meet my teddy bear Mohammed.
Then in the morning I can make us some rashers.

infidel

 

[fox58]

You'll do

 

[Feriol]

Did you fart? because you blew me away.

Are your parents retarded?
because you sure are special.

My Love for you is like diarrhea .
I can't hold it in.

Do you have a library card?
because I'd like to sign you out.

Is there a mirror in your pants?
because I can see myself in them.

If you was a tree and I was a Squirrel, I'd store my nuts in your hole.

You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away.

I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed-rock.

I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?
I think he went into this cheap hotel room.

Your eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

Your face reminds me of a wrench,
every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

 

[Dour]

Your face reminds me of a wrench,
every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

I dunno which came first but this was the reason the 'Spanner' trial was so named.

 

[Scarby]

You'll do

that works

 

[Macky]

that works

Not always, believe me, not always.

 

[Scarby]

Not always, believe me, not always.

8 out of 10

 

[Macky]

8 out of 10

Well, to be honest, I wouldn't have rated her that highly, maybe a 4