Speculation The hysterical and annoying, but traditional, totally unfounded summer 2020 rumours thread

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Players I’d not heard about before we signed them

Diabate, Kaputska, Ghezzal, Bakayogo, Marco Fuctash, John Paintsil, Michael Lamey, Leon Crnic, Ostrich Ajdarevic, Aman Verma, Hossein Kaebi, Zsolt Lascko, Sergio Hellings, Jimmy Nielsen, Harry Worley

All utter utter shite bastards

No reason to think Under is any higher quality....
You’d never heard of Sergio Hellings???
 
You’d never heard of Sergio Hellings???
Sergio Hellings’ mum had never heard of Sergio Hellings

Surprised Paintsil made the list considering we were his third English club.

I’d never heard of Riyad Mahrez until we signed him, load of shite he was an’ all
 
So it seems like most of you have written Under off as another Demarai Gray and an average signing at best, based off of a video and some stats. How about we let him play a decent number of first-team games and then write him off as another Demarai Gray and an average signing at best.
Seems fair to me.
 
Players I’d not heard about before we signed them

Diabate, Kaputska, Ghezzal, Bakayogo, Marco Fuctash, John Paintsil, Michael Lamey, Leon Crnic, Ostrich Ajdarevic, Aman Verma, Hossein Kaebi, Zsolt Lascko, Sergio Hellings, Jimmy Nielsen, Harry Worley

All utter utter shite bastards

No reason to think Under is any higher quality....

my list was mostly people over £15m or legends, not people signed in the lower leagues or champo for nowt
 
Wunder strike after astonishing blunder
 
Stop. Just stop.
 
Can we go back to bread puns? We’re good at those. These are a bit stale. Wait, no, hold on. Undercooked. Ha.
Hope he doesn’t get stollen away from us, could be the best players we’ve had since Mark Yeast, Mark Bunn or Joe Cobb. Other teams will be bruschitting themselves.
 
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