The random joke thread

[Blue Maniac]

Swiss.

Could be.

 

[MKFox]

Whats the difference between Japan and Take That?

Japan couldn't hold back the flood.

:icon_razz

 

[The Major]

I shoved some grapes up my wife's bum last night.

She didn't complain much. She just let out a little wine.

 

[MHS]

What's brown and runny?

Kelly Holmes

 

[Longcliffe]

Hi i'm Carlos Tevez and this is my lean mean fat reducing machine. I'm so proud of it I put my face on it.

 

[Longcliffe]

I was lying in bed after shagging this bird when she said, "There's something I like to do when I'm with a man, but I'm a bit shy to say it so I'll give you a clue. It's a number."


I said, "Do you mean a 69?"


She gave a little giggle and said, "Yeah, but minus 67."


I was about to ask what she meant until I noticed the smell of shit.

 

[spionfox]

Q: Who waves a blue and white scarf and sings
with Miami Sound Machine?









A: Gloria Leicesterfan.

 

[Jeff]

A: Gloria Leicesterfan.

That one's older than most of the members here.

Not been posted here since 2005 though... http://talkingballs.co.uk/showpost.php?p=84998&postcount=72

 

[MKFox]

Whats the difference between Japan and Take That?

Japan couldn't hold back the flood.

that earned my son a detention

 

[Blue Maniac]

I was lying in bed after shagging this bird when she said, "There's something I like to do when I'm with a man, but I'm a bit shy to say it so I'll give you a clue. It's a number."


I said, "Do you mean a 69?"


She gave a little giggle and said, "Yeah, but minus 67."


I was about to ask what she meant until I noticed the smell of shit.

:icon_lol: :icon_lol: :icon_lol: :icon_lol: :icon_lol:

 

[The Major]

There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those that understand binary and those who don't.

 

[Jeff]

There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those that understand binary and those who don't.

Didn't someone have that as their sig?

 

[SJN-Fox]

Didn't someone have that as their sig?

Me, a long time ago.

 

[Jeff]

Me, a long time ago.

About 100 years ago?

 

[MKFox]

About 100 years ago?

ker-ching

 

[SJN-Fox]

About 100 years ago?

Sounds about right

 

[Profondo Rosso]

My wife has been walking up and down the high street stealing all the shop fascias and hiding them in the shed................... I should have noticed earlier really, the signs were all there

 

[The Major]

I asked my mate why do divers fall backwards out of the boat when entering the water?

he said , if they fell forwards, they'd still be in the boat you daft bastard

 

[Chuck T Masala]

Sat opposite me on the train this morning was a quite stunning Thai bird, real top drawer stuff. I kept saying to my self "dont get an erection, dont get an erection"..... but she did.

 

[Chuck T Masala]

I've just had a rejection letter back from Screwfix.

They said thank you for my interest but they were not a Dating Agency.
:icon_redf