lazzers handy hints

[Durham Fox]

Dyslexics. Try deliberately spelling words wrongly. This way at least you have a chance of spelling them correctly.

 

[Joe_Fox]

Smart car owners - why just have one smart car - by another for the other foot.

 

[MKFox]

Save the expense of buying a plastic 'red nose' on Comic Relief day by simply drinking heavily for years on end until your own nose becomes red and swollen.

 

[lazzer]

Smart car owners - why just have one smart car - by another for the other foot.

still not grasped it joe

 

[lazzer]

depressed people instead of attempting suicide as a cry for help just actually shout "HELP" thus saving money on paracetomol

 

[Rayvon]

If a small child is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down its throat and hey presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed.

 

[Joe_Fox]

Chinese Folk - don't spend hours trying to think of a name for your offspring, just take all your pots and pans out on to the patio, throw them up in to the air and listen to the sounds they make as they land.

Hey presto! Ping Pang Pong

 

[Rayvon]

Increase blind people's electricity bills by switching all their lights on when their guide dog isn't looking.

 

[Steven]

Chinese Folk - don't spend hours trying to think of a name for your offspring, just take all your pots and pans out on to the patio, throw them up in to the air and listen to the sounds they make as they land.

Hey presto! Ping Pang Pong

If a small child is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down its throat and hey presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed.

He has the right idea, try copying him at first.

 

[Durham Fox]

Vegetarians coming to dinner? Simply serve them a nice bit of steak or veal. Since they're always going on about how tofu, Quorn, meat substitute etc 'tastes exactly like the real thing', they wont know any difference.

 

[Yorkshire Vixen]

If a small child is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down its throat and hey presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed.

:icon_lol:

 

[lazzer]

jeremy beadle when advertising you hilarious TV pranks DVD hold it in your other hand so it doesnt appear to be a laser disc thus preventing confusion amongst the buying public

 

[Durham Fox]

jeremy beadle when advertising you hilarious TV pranks DVD hold it in your other hand so it doesnt appear to be a laser disc thus preventing confusion amongst the buying public

:icon_lol:

 

[Joe_Fox]

He has the right idea, try copying him at first.

Who has the right idea?

 

[lazzer]

Who has the right idea?

joe are you "special" :icon_lol::icon_lol:

 

[Joe_Fox]

joe are you "special" :icon_lol::icon_lol:

From one special poster to another, thanks Marco.

 

[lazzer]

From one special poster to another, thanks Marco.

thanks for what ? asking you a question

 

[Yorkshire Vixen]

:icon_lol:

 

[Willlow]

If you are tired of waiting for buses that are late, walk to your destination.

 

[highland fox]

Tired of piling on the pounds? your weight getting you down?.... Then try eating less you greedy lard arsed fecker.