The random joke thread

[bocadillo]

And you're a whole division behind that.:icon_wink

*yawn*

 

[RHYDAL]

*yawn*

Must bee tired of jokers up your way. I'll buzz off until the ambulance arrives.

 

[Darth Vodka]

the pun is with the ion (a charged electron):icon_lol:

a charged electron?

pffffft

:icon_bigg:icon_bigg

 

[FIF]

a charged electron?

pffffft

:icon_bigg:icon_bigg

The real question is will it be charged less now that we are in League 1?

 

[Macky]

the pun is with the ion (a charged electron):icon_lol:

Ions contain electrons.
Come on Scarby, everyone knows that.

 

[Chuck T Masala]

Ions contain electrons.
Come on Scarby, everyone knows that.

My Iron is just full of scaley water that hisses out over me clothes. :icon_conf

 

[MKFox]

Ions contain electrons.
Come on Scarby, everyone knows that.

ffs, is this the same joker they gave a degree to?
:icon_bigg

 

[Dour]

ffs, is this the same joker they gave a degree to?
:icon_bigg

A Science degree, too.

 

[FryattFox]

A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months. Nurses were in her
room giving her a bed bath. One of them was washing her private area and
noticed that there was a slight response on the monitor when she touched
her.

They tried it again and sure enough there was sizable movement.

They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling him, As
crazy as this sounds, maybe a little
oral sex will do the trick and bring her out of the coma."

The husband was sceptical, but they assured him that they'd close the
curtains for privacy. The husband finally agreed and went into his wife's
room.

After a few minutes the woman's monitor flat lined, no pulse, no heart
rate.

The nurses ran back into the room. "What happened ?" they cried.

The husband said, "I'm not sure but I think she choked."

 

[Macky]

ffs, is this the same joker they gave a degree to?
:icon_bigg

Let's just hope & pray they never let him anywhere near a classroom again, God only knows what damage he might do to a child's education.
Charged electron FFS!

 

[tedfoxxx]

a man goes into a petshop and says 'hi, i would like to purchase a pet wasp please.'

the owner replied 'erm........ we are a real pet shop.......sorry, we dont sell wasps'

'oh' said the man. 'i thought you were selling them cause theres one in your window'

 

[Melton Fox]

A man who has almost destroyed his company, lost almost all of his customers and made his company a trade laughing stock goes into his boss' office;

Man: "Can I keep my job please, it's all the cleaners fault?"

Boss: "Yes, you can"

 

[The Major]

A man who has almost destroyed his company, lost almost all of his customers and made his company a trade laughing stock goes into his boss' office;

Man: "Can I keep my job please, it's all the cleaners fault?"

Boss: "Yes, you can"

Satirical.

 

[Siouxsie]

George Bush met The Queen, and he turns round and says, "as I'm the President, I'm thinking of changing how the country is referred to, and I'm thinking that it should be a Kingdom".

To which the Queen replies, "I'm sorry Mr Bush, but to be a Kingdom, you have to have a King in charge - and you're not a King."

George Bush thought a while and then said, "how about a Principality then?"

To which the Queen replied, "Again, to be a Principality you have to be a Prince - and you're not a Prince, Mr Bush".

Bush thought long and hard and came up with, "how about an Empire then?"

The Queen, getting a little teed off by now, replied, " sorry again, Mr Bush, but to be an Empire you must have an Emperor in charge - and you are not an Emperor."

Before George Bush could utter another word, the Queen said, "I think you're doing quite nicely as a Country."

 

[tedfoxxx]

did you hear stevie wonder got a cheese grater for christmas?




















best book he's ever read

 

[drummindefender]

*ahem* most violent book he's ever read!

 

[tedfoxxx]

*ahem* most violent book he's ever read!

have you ever seen his wife?

 

[FIF]

Has he?

 

[The Major]

Has he?

:icon_lol:

It's a good job he's not bitter about being blind.

He once said 'it could have been worse, I could have been born black.'










Apologies to the pc brigade.

 

[drummindefender]

i think we've exhausted the stevie wonder jokes now!